“Keep me” post-it (a poem about Karma)

You said keep me posted right before you ghosted

Can’t be mad because, shit, I just do the same thing

I’ll see a nigga calling and just let my phone ring

Won’t even consider answering

This segment of my life is titled:

“Never let me go but never speak to me again”

I should be up for an Oscar nomination

I’d face the academy

And actually expect to win

I’m addicted to gambling

I bet on an old man

He had just got out of jail

Told me “I’m 44 but I look young as hell”

I bet on a liar, a married ass cheater

A sweet man in the day, at night a woman beater

A religious leader

A vegan eater

I put it all on a bottom feeder

Guess I could never turn down a game of follow the leader

 I must look like a child in some weak bitch’s clothing, with an easily controlled mind, just entering into a “walk all over me because I don’t have a voice” pageant, as long as you show me a dollar sign

Offended, letting it run its course, offending another with no remorse

Letting my ignorance run it’s course, cursing you out with no remorse.

See I want who I want when I want him

I’ll tell you all about this guy named Tim

I’ll say “call you right back” and in the next second turn into a stranger thing

All while waiting for him, waiting for my phone to ring

Living in the upside down never turning back around

Comfortable with a smile that’s permanently upside down

“Be careful what you wish for” an incoming text

In line for a meeting with karma and she called out “Next!”

No matter what I’ve said no matter what I continue to say

My Karama is keeping track of all the guys I’ve ever played

He said keep me posted right before he ghosted

Can’t be mad bc shit I do the same thing

A dunce hat sitting on top of my crown & between my legs, tingling

By the time I’m ready to settle down by the time I turn upside down my frown

I’ll be walking down the aisle in my snow white gown

Karma will invite everyone in town

Will she finally choose who chooses her?

Everyone will be on the edge of their seats, waiting for an “I Do” but I won’t make a sound…

But I’ll keep you posted!

 

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Mystiky Maquillage

#MystikyMaquillage was born in December 2017 💋I started off just wanting to create beauty products that would compliment my #African features and to make me feel proud. ✊🏽This started out as a hobby stemming from personal feelings of wanting to see women like me represented in #beauty. ✨✨✨

Now, two years later, I’m looking at the bigger picture and my goal is to continue to create #makeup that is inclusive! 💕💕I want to create cosmetics that will make people feel confident no matter the #hue

I want to contribute to the diversity in the beauty world while promoting #AllNaturalBeauty

I dished out a ton of money over the years to support businesses and corporations (that are already profiting #millions) & I was never truly satisfied with the products that I’ve accumulated over the years.

I always wanted more information to what was in those products anyway… It took time to see the importance in supporting #smallbusiness and #blackownedbusinesses and to break the cycle of supporting brands where I am not represented… Your #skin, your body’s largest organ, absorbs almost 70% of what is put on it…can you honestly say that you know what that is on a daily basis? This brand is full of #AllNaturalIngredients in every #beautyproduct we leave out all of the harmful chemicals and other toxic ingredients commonally used.

I am inspired everyday to continue creating and my brand is dedicated to the adventurous side of me which includes #traveling the world; my favorite trip so far was #Paris, #France & that’s where the #Maquillage (meaning “makeup” in French) comes from!

I’m inspired by the what if’s in life like what if a young brown girl with huge facial features is inspired by my creativity and goes on to create her own makeup or to write a book or run a #blog, etc.

I’m inspired by the endless possibilities of the future, where #Mystiky #Maquillage will be in the next couple of years, and the successful woman & #entrepreneur I’m destined to be.

#Mystic (who believes in the #spiritual apprehension of truths that are beyond the intellect.) = Mystik

I’d like to think I’m almost at that point, but not quite (so I’m Instagram: @MystikyMaquillage & @Mystik.y)

Walter Benton- Were I Pygmalion or God

Were I Pygmalion or God 

I would make you exactly as you are … in all dimensions. 

From your warm hair to your intimate toes would you be wholly in your own image.

I would change nothing, add or take away. 

The same full red flower would model for your mouth — and from the same seashore would I bring the small translucent ear-shapes of your ears.

O the lovely throat that I could duplicate! 

The tender arms! 

I would shape your breasts the shape of the hungry little faces they are now … and tip them with the same quick mouths.

I could not make your eyes deeper than they are — nor softer to look into … nor could I turn your hips, your thighs, your belly in a sweeter curve: nor indent the hollows of your loins more tenderly — or store more honey there or fire.

How would I name you … need you ask?

You know.

By the scarlet and the blue you wear when love is upon you, by the yellow tongues — by the warm white fragrance … by the slender leaves.

I got mascara clumps & my edge controller turned my edges white #chooseYOU

It’s Only Tuesday…

Imagine spending the morning getting ready for work and it’s business as usual: you’re doing your hair, applying some makeup, picking out an outfit (that isn’t that cute but will do because it’s only Tuesday and who are you trying to impress at work anyway), and your mirror is telling you that you’re pretty, chill, and cute.

Minding your own business, you arrive to work and catch a glimpse of yourself, and think maybe you should’ve put more time into your morning routine.

This hating ass work mirror is at it again; reflecting a complete mess.

What you thought, just ain’t it, and now it’s too late.

I’m having one of those mornings.

Honestly shame on me for not giving myself the 100% I deserve. I yell “LOVE YOURSELF!” every chance I get and it’s time to start rising to the occasion.

I don’t know who else needs to hear this but: wake up and get out of bed when the first alarm sounds!

What is it about the comfort of home, the safe space that is a bedroom with a complimenting mirror and the best/worst lighting?

I can’t understand how I missed all of the clumps in my mascara and didn’t see that the edge controller I used turned my edges white.

I’m having an interesting start to my day with this unexpected tragedy; to say the least: I need a do-over.

Let’s switch gears and turn this totally random introduction to a blog post into a quick self-love and self-care piece #youngloudproud style!

How to stay Young Loud & Proud when you don’t feel like it…

It’s all about your mindset.

Confidence comes from this amazing source that is your cerebrum; I’d like to think that confidence works your cerebral cortex and requires all four lobes to go into overdrive which produces that invincible feeling.

In my case, it made me step into my workplace looking crazy but when you’re mindset is balanced with the right amount of feel-good on the inside, you’ll shine either way!

Loving yourself while balancing that inner confidence is key, however, WE need to keep that good ol self-love energy balanced with self-care.

#ChooseYou

How can we appreciate the good in ourselves without accepting and working on the not so pretty?

Choosing YOU restores an inner balance because no matter what variation of YOU you are in that moment, when you are accepting of that, you benefit from the inside out.

“Patience”  (sensitive topic)

I’m working on being patient; I used to be so impatient with everything.

It’s difficult being an immediate results type of girl. If I didn’t see the light at the end of the tunnel within the first five minutes, I’m would change directions.

The other day I read someone’s tweet (I wish I could remember who so I could give credit) but it went something like: people are so focused on the light at the end of the tunnel and don’t even realize there is no tunnel. Reminds me of the matrix theory “there is no spoon.”

Basically we create these theories & ideologies that really don’t mean anything at the end of the day. All that matters is what leaves an impression. Its how you feel about yourself, how you treat yourself and how well you preserve your mental muscle. #ChooseYOU

It’s almost as if our “problems” and “hard times” aren’t as real as we may think.  We make them real because of our strong mental muscle. Without straying too much from the topic: we are capable of making decisions that will literally reshape and change our future all we have to do is CHOOSE! We are given choice…Life is all about choice. Choose to be confident, to love you and every variation that comes with that, invest more time in yourself, preserve your feelings, monitor and police your thoughts, wake up early and get your shit together!

I know everyone is saying this but I’m not on a trendy wave I’m becoming aware of some much and while I’m making some really important changes in my life, I’m seeing the benefits of putting myself FIRST and it’s really lit.

It all started with changing my mindset and redirecting my energy (not every few minutes like the impatient me). But taking time to really see results.

I went to the Essence Carnival and was surround my some LEGENDS! One lesson I took away is that you have to stay yourself, not rush your success and to not get in the way of your own blessings. Take a chance on yourself and gamble each time, don’t be afraid to fail the first time and if you do don’t be so ashamed to ask for help (network!) people have the answers and resources to help you and you’d be surprised how far teamwork can take you (this is a tough one for me because I feel like I’m a jack of all trades and I’m constantly trying to do it all by myself…

I think it’s time to bring my Podcast back!

I want to continue with these important conversations to hopefully give out some inspiration to you all. Stay tuned and stay #youngloudproud

 

“You don’t have to get a seat at the table you can buy your own table” –IMAN @ the #EssenceCarnival #NYC 4.27.19 – 4.28.19

#YoungLoudProud went to the first ever Essence Beauty Carnival In New York City this past weekend. Check out the highlights for some of my favorite moments:

 

Thank you Essence. As an entrepreneur and a young black woman who is very new in the beauty game, I am truly inspired after hearing all of the panel discussions and key note speakers.

I mean, I had the opportunity to be in the same room as IMAN (such an iconic legend) and Ciara (one of my absolute faves ever), and to hear all of the GEMS they were dropping; I just can’t express how motivated I am to push #MystikyMaquillage Mystiky Maquillage & Young Loud Proud forward! #youngloudproud

5115 Wissahickon Ave.

Times like this my mom would say the devil is busy..

I think he has too much time on his hands

He’s taking a break while I’m filling my head

with silly things that aren’t true

In the back of my mind and in the front of my mind is you

You, telling me, reminding me of our sacred ritual

I’m head over heels, heels over heads

always indulging in a mess, stuck, never moving all the way through

Loving the lust, the lies

Comforting hellos, harsh goodbyes,

you know I love me… some you

But you, and I, this back and forth, aint nothing new

In time itll all be gone, the ending of a song, but just wait for part 2

____________________________________________________________________________________________

5115 Wissahickon Avenue

“Does Mr. Eric spend the night with your mom often? Is he living in the house with you?”

At the time I didn’t know that my mom’s best friend was questioning me only to stab her in the back. After all, I was only seven…who uses a child as a vehicle for evil and gossip?

When my mom went to work the next morning, her best friend, Mrs. Miami, handed her a copy of an email she drafted to the Philadelphia school district asking for her immediate removal as Principal from Bethune elementary.

The email contained personal information (information she squeezed from a 7 year old) about my mom’s relationship with an accused rapist.

I was only a child so of course I didn’t know what was going on.

I carried the burden of my mom losing her job which left us homeless for 4 years.

I carried that burden all by myself until I was old enough to realize that it was all bullshit and I forgave myself I told myself that I was only a child and I didn’t know what I was saying.

I didn’t know she was pressing me because she was jealous of my mom and her relationship.

I didn’t know at the time that Mr. Eric’s daughter, Rachelle, moved from Haiti to live with him and he was touching her.

I don’t know if everything was happening for a reason or if I was the worst erson in the world.

Mrs. Miami setting my mom up saved us in the long run.

Maybe if her business wasn’t put on blast, we wouldn’t have found out about his past, and his present.

Maybe my mom would’ve gotten married to the rapist.

But at the time all I know is that my mom lost her job and we didn’t have a place to live and it was all my fault.

“Why would you tell her those things?”

What did I tell?

I was only being honest.

The real question was…why is your friend questioning me about your panties?

It’s crazy how things work.

Devils are tricky.

They come to you sincere, as a friend, trusting, promissing, really beautiful lies…

America is like holding onto (but knowing you’ll never again fit into) your favorite pair of jeans

This side of the world is actually as bad as it seems

Hate is running rampant throughout America

we’re bursting at the seams

America is holding onto but knowing you’ll never again fit into your favorite pair of jeans

Life is only valued if you were born with specific set of genes

People switched teams

sold out

put their soul on the line

Our idols didn’t become rivals, but monsters, I cant even enjoy Mike’s “remember the time”

The world ended and it didn’t go out with a flashy show

but when the first murder video went viral, and only made SOME people uncomfortable

People argue over if a child’s life is worth a cigarilllo

In my own little corner, in my own uncomfy chair I can’t be all that I can be

Yeah, some people may be living what they think is the America dream

But how can any one be a millionaire or billionaire when Flint’s water still isn’t clean

In my own little corner, in my own uncomfy chair I can’t be all that I can be

I refuse to be a copy, a robot, a sheep with a slave mentality

I’ll be someone important to me, that’s better than striving to be like any celebrity

a woman who’s able to love herself, and love another just like me

I mean, sure, ice caps are melting all around me, and larger grows the sea but maybe one day I’ll finally lead the change I want to see

So when I yell out “momma I made it, turn on your big screen”

It’ll be a hundred thousand people taking a stand, creating peace, passing out prosperity

My prodigy, my mini-mes

The country is really that bad right now

open your eyes

the government is currently shutdown but are you surprised?

Its pretty sad people or working for free

All in the the name of getting funding to build a wall

Sounds a lot like slavery

Look around

Whew chile, the injustice

and from the mouths of rich there isn’t a sound

TSA workers are letting guns past security to planes leaving the ground

Gladys Knight is about to perform the national anthem and let us all down

Things are as scary as they look, If no one else is going to say it I will

Im tapping out the morse code, we need help and this is not a drill

Shout out to the bunker builders from 1999 can I get some of your blueprints before we’re finally out of time

 

(this poem was written by me some time in January 2019)

#MystikyMaquillage was featured in a Vlog highlighting the Soirée in the Cities (Girl’s Night Out) Event ❤️❤️ Check it out!

 

THANK YOU again this is amazing 💕💕💕  I really appreciate this so much IG: @living_for_the_city I love the feature ❤️❤️❤️❤️ #mystikymaquillage by IG: @mystik.y

 

If you happened to miss the recent @SoireeintheCitiesGirlsNightOut event then you certainly missed a fabulous time. No worries…click the link in the bio to see why you need to be at the next one! 🛍 https://youtu.be/JjuXRfqMtFY #livingforthecity #springinthecity

She’s not no one

Who can love you like me?

Who drinks lukewarm coffee?

Want to live the Black American dream and see if the grass is as green as they make it seem?

Tell me who gon love you like me and take the stars from the sky and constellate your dark valley

Consummate, be your team player

and fulfill your fantasy

we’re going to make a perfect team

Imagine having a brilliant women like me

Isn’t a wonderful to think

When you were brewing inside your mother’s belly

You were also being made for me

God made me apart of your destiny

Somewhere mixed up in your chemistry

A scared gene

That made you gravitate to me

A love incubating

Floating throughout eternity

Seeking my love

Desperate to find a women like me

Can you name every life form in the sea?

Then how can you tell me about me?

If I had a bill for every smile you gave me

I could give this country real change like the promise of Obi

Watch you turn into an OG and teach boys how to be real men and love women like me

Someone who isn’t nobody.

The Future is Young Loud Proud

I launched this Blog site “Young Loud Proud” and “Speak Up: a podcast for invincible girls” to encourage and educate my peers,  break stereotypes, promote diversity & inclusion, promote self-love/care, self-expression, and to celebrate art.

I want to continue with this theme and over the next five years transform Young Loud Proud into a mentoring program that engulfs my current MISSION and will encourage young people to strive for greatness despite their current shortcomings.

I want to expand YLP’s reach by visiting various areas across the world to bridge the gap between various cultures, conduct classes that celebrates individuality through art, and share the mission of  YLP while campaigning “I like me.”

There are young people with deep emotional issues and there are children who may not be able to express themselves; as a result I see a need for this mentoring art program.

The art classes given through this mentoring program will be a huge developmental benefit because it will help strengthen cognitive skills, communication, team building, and this will help children with self-expression.

Poetry

This program will be based on art that promotes the production of: poetry writing.

We’ll explore poetry throughout history and have the opportunity to review a variety of previous works (from Dr. Suess to Langston Hughes).

The educational components will include an overview of famous/infamous poets in history.

The overall goal will be to motivate children to be accepting of each other, promote diversity, and to spread love between cultures.

Cosmetic Making

These classes will teach young people how to create beauty products from scratch (this craft will help with team building, promote camaraderie, and bridge the gap between foreign cultures).

Participants will be given a variety of ingredients to create their beauty products.

They will be mixing ingredients together and (I will melt them and mold them); increasing knowledge on how cosmetics are made is a great skill to obtain.

Podcasting

I want to help young people create Podcasts ultimately teaching the importance of communication.

After learning how to create their own poetry/ short stories participants will be given the opportunity to read and record their stories and poems, explain their meaning, learn how to splice recordings/ add music & sound effects, and ultimately create an “episode” for a Podcast.

I have submitted this propsal to many different agencies for funding and have filled out a ton of grant applications. It can be fustrating to have a vision of this magnitude (without funding) and without a solid/ concrete plan to execute goals… but I am hopeful and positive!

I know I’m making these ideas real every time I talk about them, type them out, and put them on paper.

I shared this idea with everyone, I thought it was time I shared it with you.

I love you Young Loud Proud, I see the prgress, and I see your future (it’s BRIGHT)!

If you are interested in supporting this mission please email: proudloudyoung@gmail.com or support Mystiky Maquillage.

 

Thank you.

 

 

 

 

 

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