Posts tagged “i found god in myself

The Future is Young Loud Proud

I launched this Blog site “Young Loud Proud” and “Speak Up: a podcast for invincible girls” to encourage and educate my peers,  break stereotypes, promote diversity & inclusion, promote self-love/care, self-expression, and to celebrate art.

I want to continue with this theme and over the next five years transform Young Loud Proud into a mentoring program that engulfs my current MISSION and will encourage young people to strive for greatness despite their current shortcomings.

I want to expand YLP’s reach by visiting various areas across the world to bridge the gap between various cultures, conduct classes that celebrates individuality through art, and share the mission of  YLP while campaigning “I like me.”

There are young people with deep emotional issues and there are children who may not be able to express themselves; as a result I see a need for this mentoring art program.

The art classes given through this mentoring program will be a huge developmental benefit because it will help strengthen cognitive skills, communication, team building, and this will help children with self-expression.

Poetry

This program will be based on art that promotes the production of: poetry writing.

We’ll explore poetry throughout history and have the opportunity to review a variety of previous works (from Dr. Suess to Langston Hughes).

The educational components will include an overview of famous/infamous poets in history.

The overall goal will be to motivate children to be accepting of each other, promote diversity, and to spread love between cultures.

Cosmetic Making

These classes will teach young people how to create beauty products from scratch (this craft will help with team building, promote camaraderie, and bridge the gap between foreign cultures).

Participants will be given a variety of ingredients to create their beauty products.

They will be mixing ingredients together and (I will melt them and mold them); increasing knowledge on how cosmetics are made is a great skill to obtain.

Podcasting

I want to help young people create Podcasts ultimately teaching the importance of communication.

After learning how to create their own poetry/ short stories participants will be given the opportunity to read and record their stories and poems, explain their meaning, learn how to splice recordings/ add music & sound effects, and ultimately create an “episode” for a Podcast.

I have submitted this propsal to many different agencies for funding and have filled out a ton of grant applications. It can be fustrating to have a vision of this magnitude (without funding) and without a solid/ concrete plan to execute goals… but I am hopeful and positive!

I know I’m making these ideas real every time I talk about them, type them out, and put them on paper.

I shared this idea with everyone, I thought it was time I shared it with you.

I love you Young Loud Proud, I see the prgress, and I see your future (it’s BRIGHT)!

If you are interested in supporting this mission please email: proudloudyoung@gmail.com or support Mystiky Maquillage.

 

Thank you.

 

 

 

 

 

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Queen of Spies

A poem inspired by: “I Know an Old Lady Who Swallowed a Fly” & “Harriet the Spy”

RIP to the queen of spies (the one who told the truest lies)


Most beautiful when she didn’t have her cigarette, Maya, was the kindest person I ever met!

The Queen who spied was the same when the sun rose and when the sun set; not a liar at all if I had to make a bet


Don’t know for sure if everything I heard is fact or just a story


I wish I were lie detector… Where the hell is Maury?

I’ll tell you what happened to the Notorious Q.O.S (Queen of Spies) and try my best to explain this mess


I’ll tell you all about the day she died, it might make you cry or her demise might go over your head, it might just pass you by…


…if you let it.


Some say, on the third day, when God said “Let there be light” Maya was there, looking over God’s shoulder


From the vast seas, to grassy plains, to huge mountain boulders

She was there, and writing too, saw colors that filled the sky before the creator decided on blue

There she was writing all about God’s creations, witnessed the formation of every nation, before everyone became anyone this someone came and this someone knew


Maya was there to see the world sparkle, she got the first look, describing all of the world’s glory in her little book; how didn’t she run out of pages trying to describe how lit everything looked?

I wish she could tell me about the sun, and how she sat and watched the huge burning star grow; I want to hear all about the huge celebration she helped the angels throw


Alas, the world’s oldest notebook(s), which is how it all started; so many pages filled with words, sweet, yet tarted


They say Maya-ette, with her cigarette, wrote a story and made Jesus weep; wrote into the souls of men and with the flick of her pen she could change reality…

She knew why the caged bird sang, why children were really afraid of clowns, visited the black utopia, witnessed the Queen of England crack a smile, heard she greeted the Pope at the Vatican with a “My Nigga,” and laughed as he frowned…


Dubbed a “liar,” she wanted to hide the book deep inside her


Protecting her secrets all while keeping a level head

She could have shared her knowledge but decided to consume it all instead


I believe she recorded the truth, some say it was all lies, but now we’ll never know who really shot Malcolm, Martin, Kennedy, who ran down the Princess…or if Tupac is dead or alive


All because Maya decided to fill up her tummy; she ate all her secrets like they were yummy


Page by page she tore up the notebook and ate it away

I hate to spread rumors and gossip but this was a crazy day


I’ll never forget how the neighborhood just stood by and watched as Maya faded away…


Maya-ette, with her cigarette, the only living being knowing the world’s biggest secret


To the end of the earth she traveled and then she went way beneath it…


What she wrote throughout her journey she never told a soul and finally the secrecy had taken its toll

I think she went crazy, you see, so much of the world’s mystery, all bottled up she could no longer contain them


I’ll tell you about the day that came, the rainy day full of shame, the day she decided to die than to rise to fame


A sad day when she devoured all her power, like a cake made with real sugar and real flour


Delicious, private, secret words, curry, jerked, and filled with lemon curds


But no matter how people spin it, it was her own private notebook (no matter what was assumed to be in it)

First, just let me say, RIP to the queen of spies!


Here’s how she met her demise:

The Queen of spies, now permanently living in the skies, kept a notebook to write what she felt inside and who and what she encountered when she traveled through time

She recorded the first bigfoot sighting, was the only person to touch lightning, was friends with the last living giants, she knew why the men and women who went to war would come back and be sworn to silence, she was present for the signing of the Magna Carter, she traveled throughout the galaxy, some say she visited the “farther”

Words cold as ice, her spying came with a price, pages burning like fire, she would go down in history and the world’s most honest liar

I don’t really know how she felt inside, if she wrote the truth or if it was only lies, whether she was only 23 or really 2099 all I remember is how died.

Now, I’m sad to say, there’s no one to attest if there’s really a hell or if heaven is a lifetime away, who was behind 911 or if global warming is only a hoax, and why babies are the only ones who can see ghosts…

No one really talked to the girl who ate the “lies” all we know is how well she spied, so let me tell you how she died:

Her neighbors who thought she was a living lie, got together and made a shoe fly pie, made of real shoes and real flies (hardly any real pie) and presented the terrible dessert to the Queen of spies, all while trying to steal away her “book of lies”

In one gulp she finished the pie, she licked her lips and said goodbye, you would think that was all it took, but she held onto that notebook, and left her gifters shook

Holding tight onto her notebook, day by day, if the tales of monsters and demons inside it were real, I couldn’t say, all I know is that she was a creature of habit

People-watching and writing was all she ever did, and she was a pro at keeping it all hid

Never shared how the interviews went with all the children torn from their families at the border, never mentioned the mental conditions of the lifers in prison growing older, people living their lives in their cages, so much heartbreak must’ve filled her pages

You know, she never took the credit when she convinced congressmen to raise minimum wages

Some say she saw the inside of the first bible’s pages, was there when it was written, visited the earth’s core, and touched the bottom of the deepest ocean’s floor

I heard she met the president’s president (the secret societies society), made friends aliens even married twin dwarves, read the minds of all great historians, visited the moon and finds time to comfort all of the mothers’ who’s babies are “gone too soon,”

You could tell there was something that pulled and tugged and pulled and tugged, and pulled and tugged at her

Although few really tried to, no one could ever figure out what was the matter

Always looking like she fell to the bottom of a pit, she kept a facial expression that looked like she seen some shit

The more the chatter, the more people wonder what was the matter, the more she grew nervous about what people would find

She was ridiculed, called names, but if she really knew what was being said I don’t think she’d mind…

After all, you can’t really offend someone who saw how the world would end…or the one who figured out how to make reality bend

Maya was more concerned about her writing, her truth, her stories, the one thing she had that no one could take away

Here’s how she tried to hide the spying, here’s what led to her dying, here’s why people thought her stories were only her lying, here’s to what happened that day:

 I think she knew that day would come, the day when her own people would revolt against her, not the government that controlled their lives, but a little lady deemed an enemy of the state, a state of mind, a witch of a spy who had devoured a poison pie

I heard it was all a fantasy world she created while she spied, mixed with stories of monsters and demons and spirits that dwelled inside…

They say she wrote stories to heal the pain

The pain that came each time it rained

It rained because she was so sad inside

Was what she wrote the truth or lies?

I know it was the truth, she dedicated her life to traveling and crossed many tides

RIP to the queen of Spies

So, finally, here’s exactly how she died:

She was poisoned by the shoe fly pie (the one her neighbors made filled with real shoes and real flies and hardly any pie)

Then she decided to continue eating her notebook like it was cake

I saw her swallowed down her lucky pen the one used to write about heaven and the world’s end


Then a spare, without a care, she swallowed what some say was the pen she used to record a formula to create air

It isn’t fair how quickly she ate her contact lenses and glasses, no one would ever be able to look through what she saw not even if they bought the same lashes

She swallowed down the lenses to her camera, contacts too! Oh and her glasses and her eye lashes, pens and her notebook, you would think that was all it took even after eating the shoe fly pie (the one made with real shoes and real flies) but she continued on until her last breath until she died

RIP to the QOS (Queen of Spies)!


Next, she ate her favorite pets and washed them down with her cigarette, keep reading this, I’m not done yet; I can still hear Brownie barking in her stomach, a puppy, a guppy, a snake and it’s charmer

she swallowed her lighter, and her belly grew warmer…you could see the flicker of the flame burning and shining bright from deep inside her

Then, all of a sudden, there was a huge fire, the pages she ate reacted to the lighter, that was ignited by the cigarette, I’m not done yet, the pets got sick off of the uneaten shoe fly pies that stuck to her insides, as the cigarette burned and her pets’ stomach turned Maya turned blue

The flicker of the flame grew larger the one that burned and shined bright from deep inside her…


Out from her mouth was the loudest belch with a bunch of smoke so to contain the flames she swallowed some tea (more pages from her notebook), the secrets of a brewing WWIII, the future, and more unwritten history

She swallowed a first aid kit, some antibiotics, some anti flea and tick tablets her pets; a heroic meal for her sidekicks

She ate up an umbrella for that dreary hazy day god forbid if any moisture got in her way

Call her crazy, or just remember her like that girl lazy Jane, the one would wanted a drink of water but would wait for the days it rained


Maya thought she needed a raincoat, to go with her umbrella so she swallowed that in just one gulp, she swallowed the coat to protect the “GOAT” (a spare notebook) which should’ve been all it took but she kept on eating; all while her neighbors trembled and shook…


Pages from her notebook, pens, a spare, a formula for creating air, a rain coat, an umbrella to protect the GOAT, delicious tea, secrets of a brewing WWIII, consumed and you would think this was all it took but she continued on devouring anything anyone could use to read between the lines of history books

She continued to eat everything she thought would protect her, she consumed all the things she could quickly gather and the flames from the fire grew bigger and brighter…


Throughout the grape vine, they say, she swallowed boots, that were laced, with a drug that would make her pace, that would help her digest so she could continue her race

Pressed for time she swallowed mace (just in case), what a taste, she felt herself slipping away you could tell it was written on her face

Oh dear, down went some pretty underwear, momma always said to keep a spare pair

She swallowed her savings; dollar bills and piggy bank cents, bargaining chips for the afterlife and some common incense


Where she was going next, was a world full of more nightmares than dreams…giving meaning to the phrase nothing is what it seems


They say she consumed her entire room (and in it was a special broom, she would occasionally take flight at night but no one ever caught that site), a listening piece (the one she used to spy on her niece) and she ate it all down to the wire, to secure all the juiciness and details deep inside her.

Next up a recorder that hooked up to the listening piece, her favorite laptop that stored all the chatter, that tumbled and tumbled you’d asked what’s the matter?

By this time everyone had gathered around, to see the Queen who her spied on her hometown…


They watched, then laughed as she went and swallowed her own Fingerprints, we know because she was the only one who wore henna on her fingertips


By this time everyone had pulled up, all the cars from the neighborhood, some with the darkest of window tints


Watching as Maya-ette kept going, I’m sad to drag on, but she swallowed a DNA kit/she thought that idea was lit, Promised that was it, but she was still in a pit, of nervousness, so let me continue on…


She thought her passport would keep her out of court so she went and swallowed that and her fake ID, so no one could prove her true identity


So she then ate her real license, I know you’re in suspense, so let me attempt to make this make sense


She swallowed her passport and everything else I guess to keep from going to court

Maya-ette the spy decided that wasn’t enough, she wasn’t too stuffed she huffed and the smoke puffed, after she devoured her Flash drive to really save the data you would think she was finally done.

Everyone had finally won, she sat down weighing a ton, big as a house in the middle of her street not making a peep

Quiet as a mouse she closed her eyes for a really long sleep away one by one did all the neighbors creep

It was a sad sight looking at the many pounds sitting on the ground frowns stayed upside down

Hardly anyone was looking but I saw her get very tense and with the last bit of her strength, Shoved down her throat her newest iPhone, no more social media, she was finally all alone, but not on her own on her own

She swallowed her bike she used to ride to her car

She swallowed her car but down her throat it didnt get too far


It got stuck but she kept trying and eventually it slid down with the help of some muck


Then she swallowed a gun to protect her Bike, the one she promised to return to Mike


She swallowed a Gun and that made her dizzy/ she spun, she quickly changed her name to Lizzy, still protecting her secrets til the very moment she was done


All in the effort to protect her “lies” this is how she met her demise.


Here I am, her protégé, reporting on how she died that day.


Short story made long, meaning for it to be a long story short.


I went to her grave and dug up everything and began to sort, through all the things she swallowed, through every piece of precious junk


RIP Maya-ette, I’ll miss you and your cigarette, you are gone but your mission lives on.


I’d like to reintroduce myself.

Hi, I’m the new Queen of spies.

 

 

Black Utopia

You’re going to the black utopia? Can I go too?

Where the sky isn’t a typical blue

but a reddish, orangy, golden-sparkly hue.

Everyone there is just like you.

Selfless, patient, loving, intelligent, enlightening too.

Honey pours from the trees and blessings, not death, comes in threes.

You and I are the same, of course, you’d believe,

there aren’t any status symbols symbolizing or separating us because of what we believe.

There’s only one religion and that’s the belief of a longing love.

Everyone would raise their heads and never bow them again to talk to the “one above.”

We’d float down to heaven, then up to our super earth again, and then, wherever our wings would have us travelin…

Maybe we’d stop pass the old mars or visit the first stars and see everything we generalized into being just “space.”

We’ll spin and twirl and twirl and spin, until finally we pick up the pace.

We’d name everything we touch bc it would be ours to do just so, there be enough to go around no need for fighting never anyone going toe to toe.

I heard of this place called the “black uptopia” I heard it’s a place you’ve been to…

I only have one question for you.

If this place the “black utopia” exists, can I go with you?

Suppressed Deity & Young Loud Proud’s presents: Sick, Lit & LOUD

“We have been on a journey from the age of 7, creating our own stories and characters. Being underrepresented as young girls of color, we began designing our own worlds where we were able to exist freely. Presently, we are still creating platforms for disenfranchised groups, proclaiming self-acceptance. Our most recent project, Sick & Lit, is an empowering series that pokes holes in the stereotypes surrounding race, sexuality, and socioeconomic status. Please join the movement by sharing & following the link in our bio to donate to our cause.” —Suppressed Deity, LLC.

“Suppressed Deity, LLC” is an organization based in Philly that produces media content for entertainment and educational purposes.

SuppressedDeity is looking to fund their first project: “Sick & Lit” a project based on the struggles of Millennials. (please follow this link to help support their project https://www.gofundme.com/sick-and-lit-series

✨✨Check out the trailer and let me know what you think!!!✨✨

Founders, Gabbi (@november_drums) & Mishea (@diva_sass), are special guests on #YoungLoudProud’s #SpeakUpPodcast (Episode 4 titled “Sick, Lit & Loud” with #MayaDanielle @mystik.y) where they’re discussing the series Sick & Lit as well as Race, Hair, Gender, Sexuality SocialMedia, MentalHealth & so much more 🖤✨

・・・THANK YOU for a very exciting collaboration 🙏🏽💕Catch the episodes 1-4 of @YoungLoudProud’s Podcast Speak Up: An Invincible Girl’s Podcast (clickable link in bio) https://anchor.fm/invinciblegirl

Make sure you’re following @suppressed_deity (on Twitter& IG) so you don’t miss any of their upcoming projects! Stay Tuned!

Please email: proudloudyoung@gmail.com for all inquiries.

Li·bran Hollow-Cost

People tell me I got a light about me but I dwell too much on things

Wasting time wasting time on remembering memories of wasted things

I look up and stare at the moon at night, the sight of her comforts me

We have an understanding that no matter what, at the end of the night Ill count out loud my blessings

Look at me, your Libran Holocaust born in Philly, A1 cheesesteak sauce

My eyes opened, wide, wider than they’d ever been, staring right past you, past the lies, straight down to heaven

Then I look up to the moon, and she’s still there with me, shining and smiling down, what a sight to see!

There I am, I think as I see myself, just a fragment of black girl magic, made from the image of God

Heavenly woman, made so heavenly, when life gets to be getting the best of me, I’ll close my eyes and remember you’re with me

You are me, we’re one, my desire, burning bright like a fire, with my eyes wide open, I gravitate higher, and drop down to heaven, heavenly spun

You’re the one, you won me, mostly heavenly one.

Inspired by Teena Marie/ irons in the fire

Journalism ❤️ YLP blogging (Thank You)

New blog posts are up on #youngloudproud.com I’m continuing to shine light on #blackexcellence ✨ “I can’t help but to SHOUT OUT the #YLP kings & queens and their incredible stories.

There are always so many noteworthy #blackexcellence posts being shared all over my social media timelines/dashboards/feeds/etc. and I feel like the positive needs more recognition period!!!!

Thank you all!!! From the people who post/repost, to the people being shouted out- who are out here putting in the work, paving the way and grinding!

You fuel this blog:. I find so many melinated people so inspirational and motivating and at the end of the day that’s why this blog YOUNG LOUD PROUD even exists, so again, thank you all.

If you have a personal story or someone you want to SHOUT OUT for being #YLP don’t be afraid to email me: proudloudyoung@gmail.com

I look forward to hearing from you.”💪🏾❤️🙌🏾💕✨ (blogged by @mystik.y)

Here’s a bit of background just Incase you’re curious on how/why YLP came to be:

My interests in journalism continuously grow. I love to read and have always enjoyed creating stories both fictional and non-fictional. I have a strong interest in literature and always wanted to spread knowledge to teach people while spreading the truth. Growing up, my mother nicknamed me Action News because I reminded her of a reporter; consistently gathering information and investigating.

My long term goals include writing/publishing a novel and ultimately publishing my own magazine. I’m slowly but surely accomplishing my goals (An Ode to the “Good Girl” is now available through Amazon). My short term goals include continuing my education to advance my journalistic integrity and acquire additional skills. A girl can never really stop learning right?

One thing I’ll always need is to hear from YOU!! Please email me you thoughts comments concerns contributions, etc. proudloudyoung@gmail.com stay blessed, stay YLP!!

“Good Girl” #SpeakUp

(An ode to good girls)

You think you’re a good girl

Good girl, who do you think you are?

You walk around smiling, always happy, you won’t get too far

See this is the “real world” niggas will eat you alive

You can’t stand tall before shrinking down to my size

You think you’re a good girl

Goodie two shoes, kinda girl

Conceited think you’re worth something kinda girl

Who told you to smile, wear your hair all wild?

Who said you could go to church on Sundays to praise your God

Good girl, you think you are

But I know the real you

Sneaky girl, you won’t get far

I know all about girls like you

I’ll play you real close

I’ll tell you I love you while I hate you

I know how to hurt you most

You act like a good girl

Good girl, you think you are

But if it’s up to me, I’ll make sure you’ll never fill the void in your heart

You’ll never learn to love yourself truly

You’ll never see those better days

I’m your negative thoughts, self-doubt, that inner hate.

If you’re not careful, I’ll be here to stay,

always.

An excerpt from “An Ode to the ‘Good Girl’” available in paperback or kindle (e-book)

An Ode to the “Good Girl” (the story behind the cover art) #AnOdetoGG

I’ve never published a book before but it has always been a huge goal of mine to do so independently.

I fought with myself over every detail until I got tired and gave into creativity; not realizing that the perfect version of my book was slowly being lost in trying to obtain perfection.

For starters, the name originally was “Seven days til life” then changed to “Blue Cherry”. I came up with the title “Good Girl” right around the time I created “Young Loud Proud” as I became devoted to spreading positivity, focusing on Black excellence and breaking stereotypes. I thought about a label I’ve been associated with and how I’ve been constantly proving otherwise. It took almost two years to decide on the final structure; my heart (and the right side of my brain) chose the official name: “An Ode to the Good Girl.”

I came to the realization that in order to achieve perfection I needed to stay true to myself and express my art exactly as I wanted to.

Before I officially came up with the title, the structure of my book was just all over the place. Did I want to tell a specific story? Did I want to mix fiction with non-fiction? Do I incorporate my own stories? Maybe. Nah…my life isn’t that exciting. Or is it?

I already think of myself as a rhyming individual so my story was already very poetic. The first three drafts of this book were not (entirely) in poetry form but it flowed very nicely that with a lot of mind power and creativity I was able to create something that reminds me of some of the books I grew up on.

Imagine Shel Silverstein and Maya Angelou’s love child that was raised by Dr. Suess and Solange who’s god mommy is Sister Soulja. You may think “Maya is the best future ghostwriter of our generation” or “what in the knock off Shakespearian Tupac do we have here??”

That was absolutely a joke but you might get that feeling when you read through this Ode. I organized a compilation of short stories I’ve written, diary entries, poems, raps, songs, old journals, college notes, all from the past 6 years. I created an Ode to the “good girl” I thought I was, who Society deems me to be; to the girl who let her daddy down.

A lot of this comes from a sad place I was involved with a few people that I put so much hope into that I almost lost myself, but in my sadness, I found comfort in writing. I found myself by challenging myself and facing my fears.

I found a way to shed negativity and out of it came a blessing. I want to encourage the next girl to do the same.

I made a super vision board. I clipped up at least 5 magazines printed out my favorite quotes and created collage on a board that reflected myself (my wants, needs, aspirations, and goals).

The cover reflects the many sides of me rather it be revolutionary or ratchet it’s a mash-up of me and I love it so what better image to use for my cover art?

I asked about three different people to draw a cover for me (previously). I sent them each a poem and offered money if they could put a visual representation to my words.

That was silly because I realized that I am the only one who can do that and I already did (through my artwork).

As I finished up the book, having picked the official title, I was confident on choosing my board as the official cover art. Not only is it unique, it is a clear representation of the words in this book of poems. It forces the reader to really take the time to think about what they’re reading and interpret the meaning on their own.

An excerpt from “An Ode to the ‘Good Girl’” available in paperback or kindle (e-book)

We write poetry too. #youngloudproud

“I am a hustler! I am not just surviving I am thriving!” Samina Martin’s journey to self-love #ILIKEME

1. Describe yourself only using three words or expressions.

Beauty, Brains, and Ambition 

2. What do you like most about yourself? What are your best qualities?

I am a hustler! I am not just surviving I am thriving! I love that when I set my mind to something I DO IT! I love that I can be involved in 1,000 different things and I am able to give all of those things my very best. I love that I try to encourage everyone around me to do the same and live their lives FEARLESSLY! 

3. Over the past five years, what is the most important thing you’ve learned about yourself? What happened and what made it a significant moment?

– I’ve learned that I am strong. I’ve learned that dark days don’t last forever. I’ve learned there is so substitute for hard work. I’ve learned that there is no such thing as luck but preparation and opportunity. I’ve learned that I am Brilliant.  I’ve learned that the mind is so powerful and if you’re silly enough to believe you can do anything, Well then honey, YOU CAN DO ANYTHING! I can not just pinpoint one moment that led me to these realizations but instead a whole host of moments. The moment I got into medical school, the moment someone I trusted betrayed me, the moment I passed my board exam, or, the moment I had to leave my parents house and be on my own in a new city. Each of these moments was very significant in making me who I am today. 

4. Are you comfortable with being yourself on a consistent basis or do you possess many faces?

-I believe we all possess many different faces; the work face, the home face and the social face, being the most common ones. I am very comfortable being myself in all setting but based on each situation I am able to adjust.  

5. How would you survive living in a world if every other woman were just like you? What would that world look like? Would you survive in that world?

I believe very strongly in individuality and if I was to live in a world where every other woman was just like me it may be pleasing at the beginning because we will agree on everything but it would later be very boring and frustrating. I don’t think I will be able to survive a world with no individuality. 

6. Rename your favorite song, book, or movie using your name and the thing you like most about yourself.

One of my favorite songs by Natasha Bedingfield “Unwritten”. (I’m) Reaching for something in the distance, So close you (I) can almost taste it, Release (Releasing My) your inhibitions….. This song takes me to a place of total vulnerability. A place where I am cable of living my best life with no inhibitions.  

7. What does love mean to you? Has your definition of love changed over time (from being a young girl to a woman) if so, how?

Love means being understanding, Love means being a vulnerable, love means being there for someone in desperate need of companionship (friendship) even if it’s not convenient for you (putting other feelings before yours), But Love also means saying no and choosing you! Over time by definition of love has not changed it has evolved. It has matured. I am comfortable with loving someone else but I have to be able to choose me because my wellbeing has to be my priority. I’ve learned that it is okay to say no.  

8. Do you know how to love? If yes, HOW do you love and WHO do you love?

 I believe I do know how to love. The question is… Do I know how to love properly? Of course, I love my family and very close friends. I love by showing affection, by being there for the things and moments that are very important, by listening. Many people love by buying things but I think love is felt most by the time we spend and the moments we create. 

9. If I asked the closest person to you if you are capable of loving others what would they say?

HELL YEA! (hahaha)

#ILIKEME

An Ode to the “Good Girl” a book a poems that defies its title

An Ode to the “Good Girl”: A girl is many things, one thing she is not, and never can be, is easily defined.

“Good girls” have it tough. Not only to live up to society’s high expectations but to carry the weight of being “good.” What is a “good girl” anyway? That label doesn’t allow room to be wrong or selfish, disappointed or unsure, sexual or sexy, mischievous, too loud or too quiet; there’s no fair chance in growing into that woman she needs to be.

Whether she’s referred to as Maya, Mystik, or Cypher, this “good girl” is on her journey to finding self. Looking for the meaning of love and learning not to put the burden of loving her on anyone else. She’s making mistakes and learning from them. She’s been betrayed and has betrayed, love and loss, but instead of dwelling, she’s learning lessons and moving forward.

An Ode to the “Good Girl” is a collection of stories dedicated to all of the risks I’ve ever taken, the second chances I never got, and to all of the things, I thought I couldn’t say out loud. These words are for all of the girls who cry a lot and laugh out loud (especially at the worst time). For the “good girls” & the ones caught up too.

An Ode to the “Good Girls” is now available for pre order (as a Kindle e-book. Expected release 6/1/18), if you purchase the e-book you’ll get a paperback copy for a whopping 99cents. If you’re so eager and can’t wait until June the paper back version is live now for $15. Click these links for either Paperback & Kindle (e-book).

Thanks for your support.

Available in paperback & Kindle (e-book)

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